Let me explain. It was during the summer holidays of 1968. I clearly remember. It was a Friday and on the Saturday, I was due to go to Wales with the army cadets which I had joined six months earlier. As I have explained in earlier posts, I was not close with my mum as she was always at work. She usually came home, ate and went to bed. Very little contact and on her day off, Sunday, she would stay in bed.
So on Friday night, I was laying in bed--- not able to sleep because of the excitment of where I was going, when I heard my mum calling out for her mum, my nan. She was really screaming then I heard my nan calling for my aunt to call an ambulance. So I left my bedroom and went to look in my mum's room. My nan saw me and took me back to my room and told me not to worry. She said "your mum's okay".
I had a horrible night. I heard the ambulance come and saw it through the window. When I got up the next morning, it was as if nothing had happened. I was told not to worry. My mum had a bad tummy and would be home on the Monday so I should go to Wales with the army cadets and enjoy my week as neither my nan or grandad had ever lied to me. I thougt no more of it and had a great week in Wales.
I will never forget coming home on the following Saturday, walking into the living room and seeing my mum sat in a chair holding a baby. When I asked who she was, my mum casually said she is your sister, Sonia. This to me, at that time, was the worst type of betrayal. I looked at my nan, grandad and my mum and felt like my whole world had been turned upside down.
That is the day I stopped trusting people and to this day it has had an effect on my not being able to hold long term friendships.
I am blessed to have a wife who is caring, honest and is teaching me how to trust again. For that, I am truly grateful.
This is me today diving with whale sharks in Oslop Philippines.
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